How do we gather? In any gathering we may have under the 7GL umbrella.

We always aim for the kind of listening and speaking that is described by Paula Underwood, Oneida Wisdom Keeper.

Attentive listening and careful speaking. Where we are curious about each other’s wisdom. Listening to learn from each other. Where differences fuel richer thinking.

We support a welcoming environment of compassion, curiosity, diversity, and mutual exploration.

The words we speak, become the house we live in.   

Words by the poet Hafez

So we encourage the kind of exchange where the words support us to move towards the house we long to live in. The Learning Lodge we create together.

So we aim to accept others without trying to change them. Aim to create a space where we speak for ourselves, not assuming that others in the circle share our own worldviews or understand things in the same way. Where we try to avoid judgments, however hard that may be.

Where we honor everybody’s contribution. And where we deal with all that is shared in an honorable way. What is shared within the Circle, remains in the Circle is an important guide here. Unless of course words are shared with all happily consenting with it.

To feel safe to speak, the Circle needs to be safe. We all share the responsibility to ensure that such a safe place emerges. For it is not always easy to use words that all can receive easily. You may have a bias you are not aware of. You may use words from your ‘bubble’ that may be difficult to understand or heard by others.

So creating this space where all voices in the room are heard is a journey in itself. A joined journey.

For those who may have a need for some examples, a little guidance, we share a few here. For those keen to learn a bit about choosing words that can reach the other, Non-Violent Communication may be a great source.

• “This is what I wonder, and I look forward to hearing how others think.”

• “I cannot know how you feel – I can only know how what you are saying makes me feel. When you say this, I feel...”

• “Was that difficult to say?”

• “Thank you for sharing this”.